I can not lie. I shall not lie. I love good food, but to the kitchen I shall not be tied. I want it delicious- I want it fast. So I can get on...
Category: Easy Sleazy
Easy to Prepare
A riff on the term “side hustle,” this dirty fuckfest of grilled cheesery is dedicated to Eve, who said that a side hustle reminded her of a mile long dipping station to be used with an orgy of grilled cheese sandwiches, cut into tea sandwich sized bites. Say what you will about, Eve, but that bitch is creative as fuck. And an expert at planning an orgy.
If you’re gonna do the dew in this luscious, asian-inspired wing sauce, kick shit up with tried and true partners of sticky sweet with garlic, lemongrass and chilies. Top with sesame seeds and feast like the king of the mountain that you are. Because no one is going to fucking dew you unless you give consent.
Like a pretty pink nipple just waiting to be licked, this perfect Pomegranate Lemon Drop looks sweet but is full of danger. Fresh lemon juice brings the pucker to the party, but if you can’t stand any sweetness whatsoever, replace the sugar in that rim job with crushed chilies and salt. Sugar and salt and spice, oh my!
Fizzy Belgian lambic beer becomes the base of this sparkly adult slurpee, with a stiff slap to the ass from a couple of shots of 99 Blackberries. It’s like a hooker with a glittery muffin – sparkly, dangerous and meant to be plowed with reckless abandon.
Make this spiced beef tenderloin with pork if you like. When you rub chipotle hollandaise all over the place, it doesn’t matter what protein you invite to be the star of the show. Everyone will be coming. Repeatedly.
This Brazilian cocktail made of fermented sugarcane called cachaça is our savior after a long day. We turn to a caipirinha to ease us into happy hour, with sugar and lime serving as cachaça’s fluffer before filming the money shot.
The secret to this sumptuous sausage, red onion and spinach focaccia pizza is that you reap all the deliciousness of doing-it-yourself without any of the work. Kind of like using a vibrator when your hands are tired.
Chalk one up for easy, sleazy midweek meals that satisfy even the hottest foodies. This simple Thai Red Curry has you breaking out a can opener and doing a little chopping, but not much else in terms of complicated cooking. Dirty Girls win again!
Shit week? You too? Well, let’s not wallow and instead do something about it by tying one on. This sparkler is luscious and juicy with floral notes that’ll tingle you down to your toes. You deserve to feel that good given the insane week you’ve had and we are here to help. Love to love you, little mamas.